Near To Your Heart

"[Turn] to the Lord, your God, with all your heart and all your soul. For this command that I enjoin on you today is not too mysterious and remote for you. It is not up in the sky, that you should say, 'Who will go up in the sky to get it for us and tell us of it, that we may carry it out?'  Nor is it across the sea, that you should say, 'Who will cross the sea to get it for us and tell us of it, that we may carry it out?' No, it is something very near to you, already in your mouths and in your hearts; you have only to carry it out." -[Deuteronomy 30: 10-14].


When I was a little girl, I was not fed consistently. I was verbally abused, called a failure, struck and bruised. I began to shut down, not speaking, not sleeping. All I wanted was for someone to hug me and say, "I love you." More than that, I wanted someone to show me Love.

I thought- 'I will be happy if I keep my stuffed animals near me, my teddy bear, my tiger striped cat, my dachshund toy, my kangaroo toy, my baby doll.' I had names for all of these, and they all had their distinct personalities. But one day, my mother saw me lovingly arranging them on a wooden bench in my room. I was about 12 years old. When I came home from school the next day, they were all gone! I ran to my mother to ask where my "friends" were? She said, "I gave them away." I cried.

So then I thought- I will be happy if I study hard and get all A's in school. I had to study extra hard in Math, it was not my best subject. One evening at dinner, I told my parents that I gotten an A- on my Math test. My mother told me icily, "Next time it will be an A." I had to swallow hard to eat my supper.

So then I thought - I will be happy if I get accepted to my first choice in college. I WAS accepted and I was very happy there. I made friends and did well; except that when spring of my senior year came, I cried because I knew that I would be leaving that happy place. . But then, my mother told me that I would major in what she told me to study because she was paying the tuition. And if I did not follow her plan for me, I would be kicked out of the house and I was on my own. I did follow her plan for me because she forced her will on me. But my soul was crushed by living someone else's life.

So then I thought - I will be happy if I get a good job and make a generous salary. I did get that good job. But I hated the work. Every Sunday night, when the Sunday night programs came on TV, I cried because I knew that meant I would be back at the job I hated by Monday morning. Every time I tried to quit, I got a big raise and a nice promotion. I kept working harder than anyone else and lobbying for more and more responsibility. Why wasn't I happy?

So then I thought - I will be happy if I can meet the guy of my dreams and get married. Through a mutual friend, I did meet the man of my dreams, one who is kind, patient, smart and incredibly funny. We got engaged but my mother was furious. This was not the man SHE would have picked for me. My parents refused to stand in the receiving line at my wedding, and they cut us out of family holidays.

So then I thought- I will be happy if we can buy a house. We did find the house of our dreams. But then my parents refused to give us any support, monetary or otherwise, to fix it up, and then they refused to come to our house, because it was not "nice enough."

So then I thought - I will be happy if I became a mother. That joyous day came, when our son was born. But then my parents, and just about everyone else I knew, began giving me unsolicited parenting advice. And, I found out that caring for another tiny human being never can cure the longings and gaps in our own psyches.

All these years later, I am a whole lot older and wiser. I understand now that the longing in my wounded soul is with God. And God is not "out there" somewhere.  He is not too mysterious and remote that He can never be found or embraced.

I once asked a neighbor, "What is beyond Space, beyond all the skies and stars that we can see, and even the ones we cannot see?" She gave me a funny look and said, "I think that beyond that there is just more Space."

But that was not the answer that I was looking for. The way I figured it, Heaven was somewhere beyond the farthest reaches of Space, just no telling HOW far? What I wanted to know was, "Exactly how far away is God? How far away is Heaven?"

In reality, we don't need to locate God or the Divine in some indefinable place "Out There". God is NOT too mysterious and remote.

We do not need to go across the sea or through the skies to find Him. We do not need to ask anyone to bring Him TO us.

God is not found in only certain places - such as just in church.

I was looking for Love and happiness in all the wrong places. I wanted experiences and accomplishments and milestones in life to heal my Soul.

I thought I could heal my soul and find Love in comfort objects. In recognition for good grades. In acceptance at a college. In a job title and a certain salary. In the status of being married to another person. In motherhood.

But what I found out is that God IS Love. And God is no farther than my own lips and my own heart.

When I carry out that Love of God within me, FOR others and WITH others, I slowly heal my Soul. When I turn to God with all my heart and with all my Soul, I find the comfort and joy that I have always craved.

Today, I cannot say that I am "happy" in a secular sense. But I have found wisdom, peace, contentment, awe, Faith and peace. Who could for ask more that that?

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.

The Wolf Factor

"Brothers and sisters: For freedom Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery. For you were called for freedom, brothers and sisters. But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh [selfish personal desires]; rather, serve one another through Love. . . But if you go on biting and devouring one another, beware that you are not consumed by one another. I say then: live by the Spirit. . . For the flesh has desires against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; these are opposed to each other, so you may not do what you want." -[Galatians 5:1, 13-18].


A dear friend tells me that I am the most humble, the least selfish person she knows. I was happy to hear that. But I told her, that this takes constant vigilance on my part. I ask myself, at every action and transaction, 'Where do my selfish desires end, and where does my Love and compassion for the other person begin?'

Always, I understand that I cannot always do whatever I want. I have to separate out what I want, from what the other person needs or deserves. Because what I selfishly want may actually harm, or even destroy another person.

What the Bible calls "the flesh" is a shorthand way of saying "selfish personal desires". There is even a list for that : immorality, idolatry [worshipping celebrity, or fame, or material wealth], hatred, discourse, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness." -[Galatians 5: 19].

A pressing desire for alcohol, for excessive eating, for jealousy, for gossiping, of fault-finding, for anger, feelings of superiority and arrogance, for cheating, for greed, for the lies we tell to make ourselves look in better standing- all of these enslave us.

A person may fight the urge to indulge in these, may fall into that selfish trap, then descend into an emotional fall-out over the whole sordid mess. This is not freedom, it is slavery to an impulse which we hate.

All of the human temptations which trap us are now played out on an international stage. When Social Media was invented, we were told, "Together, we can change the world."

Yes, digital media can promote and multiply the good. But it can also multiply and expand the evil, as well.

A nasty epithet can be retweeted or re-sent millions of times. What passes for News is essentially Gossip, repackaged in bright, throbbing colors, with just the barest soupçon of veracity, to make it seem like the Truth. In this digital media age, we are devouring each other, with innuendo and outright lies.

 We mince and parse others' words, pouncing on each other with a loud, "Aha!", if we detect an insult that is not even intended. Someone who absolutely denies the charges is considered even more guilty.

People in the Western world believe that it is our "inalienable right" to do whatever we want. Our greatest goal in life is to amass enough money and enough power, to not have to answer to anyone.
In fact, this "personal freedom" is packaged as the American Dream.

 But cheating one's way to the top; believing oneself superior because of power or money; descending into fits of rage, are NOT Love.

The temporary, ill-gotten gains of this world are not Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Because these fruits are priceless. They cannot be bought for any coin or power or money.

Here is a radical freedom: What if this Life's Dream is to love others? What if our dream is to do no harm? What if the most precious things in Life cannot be bought for money or power?

Selfish freedom, completely unfettered, (doing whatever I want, whenever I want) is ugly, cruel, voracious and arrogant - like a Wolf.

Even for all the wine, power, money, superiority or material wealth in the world, I do not want to be a Wolf.

What I want above all, is to Love and be loved. If the things of this world, such as money and power, cannot buy my greatest desire, which is Love- then money and power suddenly have absolutely no power over me.

I grew up in a home with plenty of money, power, greed, alcohol, fault-finding, anger, feelings of superiority, arrogance, hatred, racism, ambition, jealousy, envy. In other words, I grew up with nothing to feed my soul. I entered the world, after my childhood, broken and empty.

I could not find any value in their money, power or status. These were worthless and even dangerous to me. I had to make them meaningless and without value. The power of these false idols could have devoured me. I had to render them worthless to my Life.

Chasing money and power could not fill my soul. Only Love could.

When I am gone from this world, I do not want to be remembered by what I owned, or by the power I wielded, or by the fear I invoked, or by the lies I told, or by the superiority I displayed.

I want to be remembered by how I loved. Without Love, we devour and destroy each other.

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019.

One Body

"The day was drawing to a close, and the twelve came to Him and said, ' Send the crowd away, so that they may go into the surrounding villages and countryside, to lodge and get provisions, for we are here in a deserted place.' But He said to them, 'You give them something to eat.' They said, 'We have no more than five loaves and two fish- unless we are to go and buy food for all these people.' For there were about five thousand men. . . Jesus, taking the five loaves and the two fish, looked up to Heaven and blesses and broke them, and gave them to the disciples to set before the crowd. And all ate and were filled. What was leftover was gathered up, twelve baskets of broken pieces." -[Luke 9: 12-17.]

Just today, I helped the Community Outreach ministry, by transporting some of the over 200 bags of groceries donated by parishioners, to the town food pantry.

The director of the town food pantry greeted us joyfully. It is summer and the shelves of the pantry are almost bare. Low-income children who eat free breakfast and lunch at school are out of school, so they go hungry. Hunger knows no season or even social class. A family living in a mansion may find that the main bread winner has been laid off. The house is worth a lot but you cannot eat from an asset value.

People for centuries have wondered about the meaning and the explanation of the parable of the Loaves and Fishes.

At its heart, this parable speaks to me about hunger. In the crowd around Jesus, the hunger was not visible. And yet, it was there.

I grew up a hungry child. In my dysfunctional family, we had money and we had assets but I was fed inconsistently. At age five, I had learned the signs that would portend what nights I would receive no dinner. I had to learn the days of the week. Wednesdays were a poor bet for dinner. I would eat a bigger lunch at school. Then, I would appear at a neighbor's house, looking very hungry. Often, the neighbor, a poor widow herself, would give me a piece of bread with butter and a glass or two of milk. One mom would see that I might be cold and give me a bowl of chicken soup.

Today, I wonder if we see the hunger in others? I had a physical hunger as a child. But I also had a spiritual and emotional hunger. I was never hugged or told, "I love you." I was called a failure. If I reported that I was cold, I was told to, 'Stop acting up.'

The tender Love in this parable makes me teary-eyed. It is all that I longed for as a child. All that I lacked.

In a Christian church, we are one Body. We are all different, with different races, social classes, needs, gifts and talents. We are equal in the eyes of God, but we are not the same. Each of us is critical to the health of the whole.

The Body of Christ is not just in the community, but is in each one of us. Upon our Baptism, we receive the Holy Spirit, who dwells in us, and draws us closer to God's Son.

In case anyone believes that all this is just theological "mumbo-jumbo", there are real life consequences for this belief-

When I help another person, I am seeing and aiding the Jesus who abides in him.

When I tear another person apart, with my words or my actions, I am tearing apart Jesus.

I cannot even walk away and ignore another person in the world. . . because we are all part of one body. I am responsible for you, and you are responsible for me. We are one. If I walk away from another person, leaving him to flounder on their own, I am walking away from Jesus!

I can say, "Well, you are Jewish, or a slave, or a woman or, or. . ."  But the call is to encounter everyone, Jewish or Gentile, man or woman, slave or free.

As Martin Luther King, Jr. said, " In a real sense, all life is inter-related. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly."

This is the meaning of the parable of the Loaves and Fishes. Jesus multiplies the Love exponentially, by offering His Body up for us. He says, Whatever you do unto the least of my brothers, you do unto me.

As a child, I received one bowl of soup, one piece of bread and butter. I received a ride home from a neighbor, on a cold day. Now, the great multiplier is Jesus Himself. As I see His face, His need, in all the people who are hungry, I feed the many.

As Dietrich Bonhoeffer says in his book, "The Cost of Discipleship", "It is impossible to become a [new creation in Christ], as a solitary individual. It is the Spirit who brings Christ to each several member, who builds up the Church by gathering individual members together."

This is why Jesus says to His disciples, "YOU give them something to eat."  This is why Jesus says to His disciples, "By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." -[John 13:35].

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.

From Trouble To Hope

"Brothers and sisters: We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by Faith to this grace in which we stand, and we boast in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we even boast of our afflictions, knowing that affliction produces endurance, and endurance, character, and proven character, Hope, and Hope does not disappoint, because the Love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us." - [Romans 5: 1-5].


I confess that I have spent a lifetime bemoaning all the affliction, - that is, troubles - I have had in my life. Loving friends and relatives have told me that I "need to get over it." As if I am coated in some kind of personal Teflon, and all the traumas of life can merely roll off me with no effect.

As if. . . Each trauma and crisis soaks into my soul. Trauma does things to you. I have become hyper-vigilant, waiting for the next disaster to come: the death of yet another key person in my life, the severe abuse of my childhood resulting in nightmares and flashbacks.

We are human, after all, not robots. A negative event cannot simply "fail to compute", and fall away, inert.

Some well-meaning people tell me, "Everyone has had bad things happen to them." But that makes me feel only worse. Why do people have to minimize what others go through? Have I had more than a lifetime of woe?

So, I start to recite:
Newborn: I almost died before I cam into this world. My mother nearly died, too.
Three: I came very close to drowning in a neighbor's pool.
Four: There was a fire in my grandparents' house.
Five: My dysfunctional mother did not feed me consistently. I had to find food at the neighbor's.
Six: I was diagnosed with severe asthma. My mother was a chain smoker.
Eight: Because of continual family, abuse, I shut down my emotions.
Ten: My beloved grandfather, my only ally, died. I stopped speaking.
Fourteen:  A member of the extended family committed suicide.
Eighteen: I became aware of my father's abuse.
Nineteen: My mother threatened to cut off tuition and threatened abandonment.
Twenty-three: I was the victim of a violent crime and nearly lost my life. My parents refused to allow me to come home to recover.
Forty-One: My husband and I nearly lost our infant son.
Forty-two: A massive maple tree fell directly in my path, nearly killing me and my infant son.

A Catholic friend with inspiring Faith once told me, "But all your suffering brings you closer to Jesus." I told her, "That is like someone telling you to get severely ill, so you can check into a hospital, in order to meet a cute doctor."

Lately, I am starting to see the wisdom of Romans 5, however.  The only comfort I get over the growing pains my teens son has, is to talk to other parents. We commiserate that none of our sons really WANT to take out the trash. The kids would rather indulge in screen time, and they require more than a few reminders to do their chores. I even spoke to a friend from Africa, and he laughed and said, 'More than a few boys fall asleep when they are supposed to be minding the cows, and the cows wander off. Then, there is trouble.'

Affliction produces endurance. Shared affliction produces community and even Love.

I remember telling some of my story to a wise nun. She told me, 'Your story is awful. But, go back and look over those years. God was there, somewhere. He is always there.'  And so, the next time I saw her, I told her how the neighbors fed me, or gave me rides to school when I was left to trudge in the snow alone. My parents told me that there was no God. I did not believe them. My tiny flame of Faith, which I had to keep hidden from them, was enough to give me access to God's grace. It was His grace that rained down on me when I was fed, taken in out of the rain, and encouraged by others. It was God's Love carried forth by my neighbors.

Beyond that, Christians are to keep their eyes on Jesus, not on our troubles. Dietrich Bonhoeffer, in his book, "The Cost of Discipleship", said, "If we behold Jesus Christ, going on, step by step, we shall not go astray. But, if we worry about the dangers that beset us, if we gaze at the road instead of at Him who goes before, we are already straying from the path. For He Himself is the Way." - I have to tell myself, that whatever it is that I face, Jesus has faced Himself, and then some. If Jesus cannot walk with us in Love, no matter what we face, no one can.

From affliction comes endurance, and from endurance character. Sometimes I don't think of myself as having strength of character. But many people who know me say that when they see me, they see Strength. I could not have survived what I have without strength of character. It is what has made me refuse to give up.

It has been a hard-won strength. I am asked all the time what has saved me? I say, "Hope. And Faith".

Call me foolish to be a Christian. But I have survived only because I have Hope in Something or Someone who is purer, stronger, eternal, Divine. The vagaries of Life can change in an instant. Family you thought would love you unconditionally can hurt you immensely. You can possess a fortune one day, but lose it utterly the next.

And where IS God? He is inside us. I thought my family, by denying God, could take my Faith away. But no, my Faith is my inborn desire for what is timeless, unconditional and eternal. The more trouble I experience, the stronger my Faith and the more unrelenting my Hope. Because the Love of God has been poured out in my Heart, through the Holy Spirit. I shall not falter.

Bonhoeffer says that "the curse [of being rejected and of suffering ills] will not harm the disciples, but the Peace they brought returns to them. You must not be depressed, for what others refuse will prove an even greater blessing for yourselves. To such, the Lord says, ' They have scorned it [Hope, Faith, Love], so keep it for yourselves."

And what we retain is far more valuable - endurance, character, Hope, and the Love of God poured out into our hearts. All these are priceless.

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.

Spirit Flame

"When the time for Pentecost was fulfilled, they were all in one place together. And suddenly there came from the sky a noise like a strong driving wind, and it filled the entire house in which they were. Then there appeared to them tongues as of fire, which parted and came to rest on each one of them. And they were filled with the Holy Spirit. . ." -[Acts 2:1-11).


Pentecost, Greek for "50th", began as the Israelite Festival of Weeks, the celebration of the spring harvest held 50 days after the offering of firstfruits at Passover. Over time, the Israelite Pentecost became a celebration of the giving of the Law (Ten Commandments) at Sinai.

In the Christian Church, Pentecost celebrates the birth of the church. After Jesus was crucified and died, He came to His disciples in the upper room where stye hid in fear, and He breathed the Spirit on them. Then they were charged with going forth in courage to spread the Word.

Even before His death, Jesus told His disciples, "If you love me, you will obey what I command. And I will ask the father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever - the Spirit of Truth. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.  . . He who does not love me will no obey my teaching. I have much more to say to you, more than you can now bear. But when He, the Sprit of Truth comes, He will guide you in all Truth. . . -[John 14: 15-18; 16: 12-12].

When a Christian is baptized as a very young child, he or she receives the Holy Spirit within them. When a young person is Confirmed in the church, he or she receives the Completion of the Spirit.

As we walk through life, we are not alone in facing the myriad difficult issues that we encounter. We have a Comforter and Teacher within us, to guide us. Some would say that the Holy Spirit is that soft inner voice within, prompting us to "do the right thing." We can follow that inner voice, or we can defy it.

I grew up in highly dysfunctional home. There was abuse of every kind- physical, emotional, verbal, sexual. Gradually, I shut down, first vowing to show no emotion, then to feel no emotion, then to stop speaking, then eating little and sleeping little.

People are shocked at how I turned out. In my home, there was dissension, drinking, anger, jealousy, strife, physical violence, neglect, rejection, blackmailing, emotional recrimination, abandonment. Obviously, these are not the fruits of the Spirit.

When we receive the Holy Spirit, we receive the inclination towards the Gifts of the Spirit: Wisdom, Understanding, Counsel, Strength, Knowledge, and Awe of the Lord.

As a child, I "knew" in my heart and soul that these were how I was to behave. I wasn't merely trying to be good for the sake of being good. I longed for a life that was NOT filled with violence, rejection, abandonment and hate.

Where my brother hit me, I knitted him a sweater. This was Strength, countering Hate.

Where my mother berated me verbally, calling me a failure and threatening abandonment, I weeded her garden. This was Wisdom, countering rejection.

Where my father drank and abused me, I did chores around the house, such as painting and raking. This was Understanding, countering enmity.

And when I turned 18, I left home for good.

I was a joyful child- I sat in my room and sang songs. I looked forward to the day when I would be safe. I had patience, to make the best of my situation, and to leave peacefully when I could.

I have received the Fruits of the Spirit today: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Generosity, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control.  I am sometimes in awe at how I am able to live my life after my early life.

I have Wisdom and Understanding at what happened to me. I did not deserve what happened but I understand my early life was all about what my parents had to give, not about what I myself lacked.

I have Strength and Knowledge, that I can move into a joyful and fruitful Life.

I have Love now, people who love me, and people whom I can love.

Patience and Kindness and Gentleness are critically important to me, because I know all too well what a lifetime of Hate and cruelty feel like.

I am generous now, because of all the times I was not fed, or not loved, or was judged and rejected.

I am above all Faithful to the God who created me, who protected me and who walks with me.

Happy Pentecost.

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.

[Related Posting: "My Pentecost Life", 5/15/16; "Pentecost: The Birth of the Church", 5/24/15; "Healing Gifts", 5/23/12.]

Love One Another

" My children, I will be with you only a little while longer. I give you a new commandment: Love one another." -[John 13: 34-35].
" In a little while, the world will see Me no more, but you will see Me. But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you. . .  Do not let our hearts be troubled or afraid." -[ John 14: 23-29].


To say, "Love One Another", today, seems poignant and naive.

People who are not Christian, and who have not read the Word in the New Testament, would not recognize a Christian as one who "Loves one another as I [Jesus] has loved you." Critics of Christianity would not see that we are to know Jesus, and to recognize His followers as ones who show Love.  John 13: 34-35 says, "This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have Love for one another."

We modern people judge each other mercilessly :

A woman working in an office building is mocked for being "too thin".  It turns out she has cancer.

A guy who has turned to a vegetarian diet is ridiculed for being rigid about what he eats. It turns out he had blockage in most of his arteries. After heart surgery, his cardiologist told him that the only way to avoid a heart attack in the future is to eat no meat.

A student is harassed and bullied by another student. He goes to administration to ask for mediation and recourse. The student's grades plummet. He is told he did not "ask for help", and he is kicked out of school for poor work. The bully remains in school with no consequence.

A woman joins a prayer group. She has had many traumas in her life. She asks the prayer group to pray for her. The groups-leader prays, 'I hope you are not learning to become a victim.'

A young wife and mother learns that she has a serious and chronic disease. She tells her Christian friends about the new exercise and diet regimen recommended by her doctor.  One "friend", claiming to be a Christian, says that the mother is foolishly trying to cure herself and does not have enough Faith.

An older lady sits in the last pew at church. She has a racking cough. Each time Scripture is read or the pastor speaks, she murmurs, "Yes, Lord." And yet, people seated near her make faces and mock her. She has a chronic lung disease and is on oxygen.

We are known to each other, and to God, by our Love.

Our lack of Love today is heartless - and heartbreaking.

What passes for News - have you noticed?  - is actually shameless and shocking gossip, innuendo, cruelty, and lies. A newscaster or an online outlet broadcasts all this. Then it all spreads on social media. Each time the cruelties and lies are repeated, it is another nail crucifying Jesus.

We cannot claim to be Christian each time we participate vicariously in the Crucifixion of Jesus.
We cannot walk closer to Jesus, even as we spread lies and Hate and judgment against others whom we barely know. We cannot seek to love God, if we cannot love each other.

Loving one another is "Soul Work".  It means walking alongside one another, not standing to the side and slinging arrows. It means taking the time to comprehend each other's Joys, Sorrows and challenges.

It means "going deeper" into the Heart of another. . . Not judging from the surface and walking away, feeling smug and superior.

Love is a lot of hard work. But in the end, LOVE is all we really have!

[Related Posting: "The ABC's of Love", 4/27/13; "Hate = Murder", 2/127/11.]

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.

The Voice

"Jesus said: 'My sheep hear my voice; I know them and they follow me.  . . No one can take them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one can take them out of my Father's hand. The Father and I are one.' "-[John 10: 27-30].

On the popular TV show, The View, Joy Behar ridiculed Christians for saying that they "hear Jesus' voice."  Bear said, "It's one thing to talk to Jesus. It's another thing  when Jesus talks to you." She went on to say that hearing voices is "a mental illness."

I have to say that when I decided to join my church, and my pastor was talking me through the process, he told me how to pray. After a few attempts at this practice, I ran back to him, "spooked" because I was getting answers! He chuckled and said, "Oh. I think you'll get used to it."

This "conversation" with Jesus is called Prayer. We humans may feel so limited that we believe that a conversation with Jesus is merely a one-way dialogue. We beg Jesus for forgiveness, or for personal favors, such as enough money to pay the bills, or an A+ on a test - but many of us are completely astonished when Jesus actually answers!

I have been meditating upon what Jesus' Voice is like, or what He is conveying?

Could I get confused if His Voice seems to point me in one direction, only to find it may be a false turn?

Certainly, Paul talks about the cacophony of voices in the world that can mislead or even wound. In
1 Corinthians 13: 1, Paul says, "If I speak in the tongues of men and angels but have not Love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal."

I am finding that the simplest way to discern if God is working through someone or if He is telling me which way to turn, IS THAT - when the message is not rooted in Love, it is not God!

These days, so-called friends have said some cruel things to me.  They berate me or are unkind or they judge over things they know nothing about. If I listened to everything the world told me to do, or told me about myself, I would be spinning and twisting as if buffeted by dangerous winds from all directions.

Becoming a Christian, growing as a Christian, is a long, hard walk. My pastor explained to me that we all have the Holy Trinity inside of us. The longing for God - Something or Someone greater and more eternal than ourselves- is innate; and we possess the capacity for His unconditional Love deep within us.

But anger, jealousy, bitterness, impatience and so forth threaten the fulfillment of that unconditional Love. When I hear those cruelties, I have a visceral response, because that is not what God wants for me, and that is not God speaking to me!

I have been whipped around by the viciousness of the world lately. Someone makes one small, unintentional mistake or utters something unwittingly insensitive, and that person is driven to the edge of society. This viciousness is flamed by social media and lives on forever in the cloud. The person who erred is never forgiven and never allowed to redeem himself.

But then again, complete strangers have spoken the Word of God to me, have lifted me up with their kindness and wisdom.

That is, that must be Jesus' Voice! That Love and compassion is what I shall follow:

"I heard the voice of Jesus, say, 'I am this dark world's Light; Look unto me, thy morn shall rise, and all thy day be bright. I looked to Jesus, and I found in Him my Star, my Sun; And in that Light of life I'll walk, Till traveling days are done." -[Hymn: "I Heard the Voice of Jesus Say."]

[Related Postings: "She Talks To God", 4/23/18; "The Shepherd's Voice", 5/8/17; "Hearing the Shepherd's Voice", 4/19/16".]

(c) Spiritual Devotional 2019. All Rights Reserved.