Out of the Desert

" Do not forget the Lord, your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery; who guided you through the vast and terrible desert with its seraph serpents and scorpions, its parched and waterless ground; who brought forth water for you from the flinty rock and fed you in the desert with manna, a food unknown to your fathers." - [Deuteronomy 14B-16A].


It is said that the Israelites wandered an extra forty years, lost in the desert, because when they first saw Canaan, The Promised Land, they refused to enter it. The Israelites had no faith that this fortified land could be theirs. Only Caleb told Moses and their people: "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly [conquer] it." --[ Numbers 13:30.]

But the majority of the scouts sent to explore Canaan concluded, in fright, that The Promised Land was unconquerable.

Even as the Israelites fled back into that harsh desert, God guided His people "through the vast and terrible desert, with its seraph serpents and scorpions, its parched and waterless ground."

How different my life would have been, had I had Faith only in myself!

This philosophy of Human Achievement was the very basis of my parents' thought. If I couldn't accomplish something, I "wasn't trying hard enough". My failure was all my fault.

This Worship of Human Achievement has come to fruition today, in the modern "new-age" thinking that, 'IF we dream it, we can do it.' The motto is, "THINK. BELIEVE. ACHIEVE." Or, "IF you think it, it will come to be."

Yes, I agree that if we are unwilling to do the work, if we lack the confidence to even try, we will go exactly nowhere. This was the Israelites' fatal error-- Relying only on the potential of their own manpower, they concluded that The Promised Land was not conquerable.  Thus, they did not even try.

But the "THINK. BELIEVE. ACHIEVE." philosophy lacks one very critical element: God Himself.

The belief, that we can accomplish only what we humans can effect by our own hands, is limited thinking, indeed. This philosophy is egotistical in that we overestimate our own abilities. To the extreme, this philosophy can lead to serious anxiety and depression, as we continually try to make big things happen on our own, then fail at every turn.

Or, we can simply stop trying to accomplish anything since we are afraid that we will never be capable of accomplishing our goals.

I think back on my childhood, and I wandered in a metaphorical desert, just like the Israelites. I had inconsistent access to food. I was endangered, by the abuse at the hands of my mother, my father, my sibling. These were "my scorpions and serpents".

As a tiny child, I put myself down for naps, I found food, I hid anywhere I could to avoid the abuse -- in the bushes, on the rooftop, up on a high hill.

But how could I have furnished these things for myself, if it had not been for God? By the power of the Holy Spirit, I was given what I needed to survive. Neighbors gave me rides to school in the rain. Neighbors or friends' parents gave me snacks that were more like a meal-- bread and butter, glasses of milk, chicken soup. Oh, this was like water on "the parched, and waterless ground."

This was like manna from Heaven, such as the Israelites ate. They were allowed to eat only what they could gather and eat in one evening. They could not keep any for tomorrow.

I had to learn, as a child, to have Faith that if my parents did not feed me, food would come from Someone Else. I had to eat what I had found or been given that day, and let go of the rest, for tomorrow was another day. By Faith in God, I was able to accomplish much more than I could for myself!

Today, I am not bitter about these experiences. Bitterness would only cause me to wander for decades in a self-imposed desert of exile. What I cannot do for myself, by myself, either God will provide; OR, God will help me to endure the burden.

But these traumatic experiences have made me very grateful for what I DO have -- food to eat, a safe place to rest my head, someone at last to tell me that I am loved, a home free from physical violence, verbal abuse, emotional abuse. . .

No, I do not forget the Lord my God, who brought me out of the desert. I do not grumble and complain; and I do not live in extreme Fear. I replace my Worry with Prayer. For, as Paul says in Romans 8:15, "For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to Fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, "Abba, Father."


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