Prepare The Way

" God is my witness, how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. And this is my prayer: that your love may increase ever more and more in the knowledge and every kind of perception, to discern what is of value, so that you may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit . . . . that comes through Jesus Christ, for the glory and praise of God."  [ Philippians 1: 9-11].

Advent is a time to prepare the way for Jesus' coming into this world, yet again. In fact, every day of our lives should be like Advent, relinquishing whatever keeps us from God and Jesus, and discerning what is of value in our lives.

My entire life has been like that, abandoning what has been a distraction from the real sense of self; and embracing those elements that are timeless and eternal.

I have had times in my life when the only person who treated me with tenderness has died. I have had times when the most horrible images of the past have come rushing back in such a vivid way, that I have felt as if I was reliving the traumas. I have had times when I have questioned what my life is all about, or is even worth?

In those times, my life seemed as if it was a flimsy house built on sand. I have had to sift through the rubble of my life, trying to discern what was of value, so that I could rebuild a shelter that was pure and meaningful.

When, as a child, I was sometimes not fed, I had to figure out where else I could find food. I learned over the years to give up on Gluttony. No, these days I do not follow what foods are "in fashion". Perhaps pomegranate was all the rage a few years ago, and coconut water is so very fashionable today. But, today, I eat to live; I do not live to eat.

When I was a child, a sibling would verbally abuse me daily and my parents would say, 'You are too sensitive.' I would get angry and cry and stamp my feet. Then my sibling would hit me. My mother would say, 'You are angry. Don't be.' I learned early on that Anger can derail you. But, I do believe in "righteous anger", the kind that spurs you to action-- because some things just cannot be.

I would complain, as a child, about this person and that, and their annoying habits. I would really let these things get under my skin. My mother would say, "No one is as perfect as you." I learned to relinquish my Pride. It was only making me judge others, when I needed my energy to take care of myself.

My family would use money as a weapon to mold my behavior and beliefs. In university, I was told, if you do not study what we tell you, we will cut off tuition. I learned to relinquish Greed. Wealth, if misused, can become a tool for blackmail and overarching power. But, today, I know that what I need is simply enough.

Although no one ever hugged me or said 'I love you', I decided that the answer was to love others from the heart. My Love became an action plan. When others dismissed me, I got busy. I never had any use for Sloth. If no one else in my life could love, I decided that I had better get busy and love those around me.

I have focused, sometimes bitterly, on what I have lost in this process. But I am beginning to see that, by giving up on some temptations, I have in reality skirted some dangerous traps. I have cleared away the rubble and in doing so, I can see more clearly what is precious.

John the Baptist said, " Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for Him. . . .[For] the crooked roads shall be made straight and the rough ways made smooth, and all shall see the salvation of the Lord." [Luke 3: 3-6].  

Sometimes I am in despair, wondering what I have left, after all the traumas and losses and deaths in my life. Really, I have "died to self." What now do I have to hold onto? Have I really lost everything?

No, I cannot believe that! What I have left are the most precious things of all, the promises of Advent -- Hope, Love, Joy and Peace.

And in the end, I have made way for Jesus.  I have relinquished only what would threaten to derail me. I have made straight paths for Him and I have endured the rough ways, in order to treasure His ways, that are only smooth!


[Related Posting: "Anger in the Temple", March 10, 2012].

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