Peace Be With You

" On the evening of that first day of the week, when the doors were locked, where the disciples were [in fear], Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, 'Peace be with you.' When He had said this, He showed them His hands and His side. The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, 'Peace be with you.' As the Father has sent me, so I send you.'  And when He had said this, He breathed on them and said to them, 'Receive the Holy Spirit.' " -[ John 20: 19-31].


In John 20, the disciples are locked in an upstairs room, in the throes of a fear that they, too, might be crucified.  As soon as Jesus literally walks though the door and the walls to encounter them, the disciples know Jesus by His wounds. . . . By His wounds. . . .

Later in John 20, the disciples tell Thomas, who was not with them at the time, "We have seen the Lord." But Thomas says to them, "Unless I see the mark of the nails in His hands and put my finger into the nail marks and put my hand into His side, I will not believe." -[John 20: 25].

A week later, Thomas encounters Jesus, who tells Thomas, "Put your finger here and see my hands, and bring your hand and put it into my side, and do not be unbelieving, but believe." -[John 20: 27].

I grew up in a family who could admit to no wounds. There was a private war going on in my home, but when teachers became alarmed at my unnatural quietude, my mother told them firmly, "She is just quiet. You know, 'Still waters run deep.' "

My parents lectured me that we were superior: Translate- We were NOT Italian, black, Jewish, poor, immigrants, uneducated. . . .

I was expected to get straight A's. Once, I received a B or even a B- in one class. I knew I would be reprimanded at home. My mother lectured me, "Next time, you will get an A".

In my family, there were to be no wounds, no mistakes or even accidents, no signs of weakness whatsoever.  Everything was "my fault", even if it wasn't. If I made a mistake, my mother would say, "Why did you do this?"  If I fell down, my mother told me, "Get up. Don't cry. You are not hurt." - even with blood running down my leg.

When I graduated from school and took a job at a bank, I wanted to be the "perfect" bank officer. I dressed the part, in my gray suit with matching gray pumps and my perfect silk blouse. I was calm, professional, clinical, logical. But once, I let my guard down.  I was dealing with an unyielding employee in the back office. I came racing out of his workstation, angry and rather loud. I felt ashamed, until my wonderful assistant of many years turned to me and said, " So. You ARE human. Actually, I like you better when you are angry." What a revelation to me.

Jesus is known and beloved even though on a secular level, He "failed". Actually, He is beloved for that very reason.

Jesus is spectacularly, violently wounded. And so are we, on so many levels.

I always wondered how Jesus could possibly have said, "Peace be with you", when he had holes in his hands and sides, nail marks in his fingers, and when He as God's beloved Son was humiliated, crucified and vilified by an angry mob.

But in this first encounter with His disciples after the crucifixion, He literally breathes Peace upon them. The Holy Spirit, the Advocate, the Counselor, stays with them, even as Jesus is "gone", but not really ever "gone".

I realize that Jesus' wounds are proof that I can be quite wounded myself, far less than Perfect, and I will never be alone.

What we are called to believe in is the Truth of His wounds. We are called to believe that we have essential worth, despite our own wounds. We are called to believe in the God who says, " I am the Lord your God, you are my People and I will walk with you."

We are called to believe that the possibility of Redemption and Resurrection are as real as our wounds, His wounds.

We are called to believe that "The possibilities of God begin precisely where human possibilities end." -[Archbishop Blair.]

We are able to finally see and believe that as faulty human beings, we cannot do it all alone and we don't have to! We are allowed to be faulty - in fact, we are supposed to be imperfect. We are, by definition, only human.

In this age of "the tyranny of the individual", it is fashionable to believe that the individual alone can be all, do all, transform all.  But what a huge weight on our shoulders to believe that we are "it". I am fully aware of my faults, weaknesses and wounds. When I fear that I am to accomplish the utmost, nevertheless, I get anxious, confused and depressed.

But, the very Source of my Peace is when Jesus shows me Himself, wounds and all, and says, "Lean on me. " He bears life's wounds WITH us and FOR us. That gives me Infinite Hope.

[Related Postings: "Without a Doubt", 4/26/17; "The Benefit of the Doubt", 4/29/14; "His Divine Mercy", 4/7/13; "The Truth of His Wounds", 4/13/12.; "Doubt", 5/1/11].

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