STOP Abuse

" How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God. Dear Friends, now we are children of God!" [1 John:3: 1-2].

Did you know that April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month?

In some ways, that leaves me sick at heart. EVERY month should be Child Abuse Prevention Month!

The greatest message I have gleaned from the Bible, and from my life, is that it is all about the Love, my friends. Yes, we are children of God. Then why do we treat each other so brutally?

And the greatest sin is the abuse of innocent children. Abuse is akin to murder, because it destroys the soul. It fractures the psyche. It leaves the child vulnerable and unable to feel safe anywhere or with anyone, for the rest of her life.

 What is abuse? It is not always the stereotyped image we have, of a child who is bruised and battered from physical abuse. Certainly, that is one egregious example.

Often, it is more subtle. Verbal abuse, for example. Have you ever been in the supermarket or at the park and heard a mother yell at her child? Mothers who call their children a failure or an idiot are child abusers. This kind of verbiage tends to get internalized, until the child gives up trying to accomplish anything.

Or, abuse can be lack of medical attention. When I was 14 or so, the treatment for my severe asthma unaccountably stopped. As an adult, I struggle with the effects of this every day.

Or abuse can be physical deprivation: the lack of maternal affection. No one hugged me or said I love you when I was growing up. Or it can be withholding of food.  Demanding that a child eat what is provided for dinner or there will be nothing else, not even a piece of bread. This leads a child to exhibit hoarding behavior and to develop life long eating issues.

The most heartbreaking form of abuse is sexual. It shatters the child, leaving her unable to form secure attachments with any human being. It can lead to a devastating lack of trust in even God, and destroy her Faith. It can cause her to believe that she is worthless, to believe that she does not matter.  The deepest pain is the pain of feeling that you are not fully human, that you are a thing, or that you do not even exist.

The signs of abuse can be subtle: a child ceases to speak. Is she merely a quiet child, or is there a lot more going on? Eating habits change and the child either gorges herself constantly, or virtually stops eating. She seems to wall herself off and has no close friends. She barely sleeps (this is called hypervigilance). Or she seems depressed and sleeps constantly. She drops out of favorite activities. Or she is angry and becomes belligerent.

The pain from abuse is searing and deep. It is not something the child can ever escape. It even comes at night in the form of nightmares. Sometimes, as the child  matures, she turns to drugs, alcohol, or promiscuity to dull the pain.

In the worst case, the child gives up and gives in to despair. She believes it is better to be invisible, or not to have been born at all. This deep despair can easily lead to suicide.

I love the Scripture in Matthew 19:13: " Then the little children were brought to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked those who had brought them. Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as them.'  "

Jesus, place your hands on all the little children. Let them know the healing power of your love. And may we all be like Jesus and make it our life's work to love, and protect, and heal  all the little children. 

(c) The Spiritual Devotional 2011. All Rights Reserved.